Conquering the Waves: Managing Sailing Anxiety

A little about the author, I learnt to sail on several flotilla holidays with friends some 20 years ago in my mid-20s, traveling

throughout mainly the Greek Islands as one of the few boats it appeared that always put up the sails. Spring forward to 2017 and my partner and I brought our first sailboat, "Blue Mist" a 42 ft Jeanneau Sun Odyssey. Eager to learn “properly” we did several RYA courses, I obtained my Day Skipper, ICC, Sea Survival and Diesel Engine certifications (my partner already a yacht master power converted to sail). We sailed the UK south coast and across to France for several years, before as covid lockdowns released us back into “normal” life and vaccinations round two opened up international travel once more we decided now was our time to explore.

Sailing down the European Atlantic Coast to the Portuguese islands of Porto Santo and Madeira before arriving in the Canary Islands ready for our Atlantic Crossing in December 2021 with the ARC. It took us 20 days and approx. 16 hours to cross the 3018 NM from Las Palmas to Rodney Bay, St Lucia, since then we have travelled throughout the windward Caribbean Islands and ABCs in 2022. In 2023 we have journeyed via Jamaica, Grand Cayman, Cuba, Bahamas and are currently based in Luperon, Dominican Republic for this years hurricane season. As a couple we rotate our night shift patterns predominately 3 hours on and 3 off, with day shifts sort of the same but flexible depending on how tired we are, how good the fishing is and who fancies cooking today. It continues to be an incredible adventure and a relatively constant work in progress for me directly when it comes to sailing related anxieties.

Sailing, with its picturesque sunsets, gentle breezes, and sense of freedom, has long captured the imaginations of adventurers and dreamers alike. However, for some, the thought and realities of setting sail can evoke feelings of anxiety and unease as well as a sense of exploration and joy, as the realities of imperfect weather windows, squalls, responsibility and isolation insert themselves into everyday life. Sailing anxiety is a real and common phenomenon that can hinder individuals from enjoying the beauty and thrill of being out on the open water. In this blog post, we will delve into the causes of sailing anxieties that I have experienced and some strategies that I use to manage my fear, hopefully enabling you to embrace the wonders of sailing with confidence. This is an ongoing process and I will admit my strategies are not perfect or a cure all, but addressing them directly or at least acknowledging them will help you to manage the issues when they arise.

Sailing anxiety can stem from various factors, everyone is different, these could include fear of water, fear of the unknown, fear of capsizing, or even fear of being confined on a boat, fear of being in or losing control and our past experiences. The unpredictable nature of the sea, the vastness of the ocean, and the perceived lack of control can all contribute to feelings of unease. If you find yourself in a situation, it's important to take note (in all likelihood after the fact) of what the cause was, how it impacted you and then you can look at ways of addressing, coping and managing future instances. For example, in my case, whilst the vastness of the ocean and being far away from land doesn’t drive a reaction, the closeness of other vessels, Cowes Week in the Solent made me physically feel sick and incapable of action. And the fear of making the wrong decision when faced with the need to react quickly to a situation, can make me in the worst instance freeze and at its best just be an unhappy companion for my partner.

Everyone has fear and anxiety, whether you’ve been sailing for 10 minutes or 50+ years, it's our ability to manage our reactions and how we can help those around us manage as well. As I’m keen to stress that my anxieties don’t just impact me, my partner is also impacted and this can in turn make his experiences take on a negative turn. By working together, talking and looking at situations and solutions it has helped both of us enjoy our cruising lifestyle more thoroughly.

Below are some strategies I’m using to help me manage my sailing anxiety. This is not an exhaustive list but I hope some of the below can help you spend more time enjoying the water.

Education and Familiarization:

Knowledge is power when it comes to overcoming anxiety in general, specifically with sailing however I believe its important to take the time to learn about sailing, navigation techniques, and boat safety. Familiarize yourself with the basics of sailing, such as understanding wind patterns, tides, and boat handling. Join a sailing course, gain some experience and competency so the basics become second nature and practice those skills as much as possible. Join forums, Facebook groups and ask questions about the reality of sailing, not just the fun side but the more challenging situations from those who experienced them first hand and can provide valuable insights and tips. But remember you know you, so take what you can, but don’t take it all as gospel. The more you know about the activity, the more confident and prepared you will feel.

Also, as much as it isn’t fun to think about all the things that can go wrong, I’ve found that talking regularly through potential situations, what could happen, how you could prevent a situation you find stressful occurring in the first place, or the steps/actions you can take have helped me (and my partner) formulate action plans to reduce my more severe reactions.

Exposure:

Start small and gradually expose yourself to sailing environments. Begin with short trips close to the shore or in calm waters, where you can build your confidence and get comfortable with the boat's movements. As you become more at ease, venture further and challenge yourself with longer journeys or slightly rougher conditions. Slowly expanding your comfort zone will help reduce anxiety and increase your resilience. And where possible, try and make sure you're directly involved with everything, being in heavy weather as a passenger is not the same as physically being on the helm.

The helm, for example, is one of the more challenging areas for me and can drive my anxieties acutely. Taking control and being responsible in stronger weather conditions or in close quarter environments when changes happen quickly makes it challenging and my flight rather than fight response can be overpowering. It is very easy to slip into deferring to the person who has the most experience or can simply handle their anxieties better to be more functional. Sometimes this is a valid option, I’m not suggesting that in difficult conditions the person with the stronger skills shouldn’t take charge of a specific task. However, try not to make this your default coping mechanism any time that the task arises, when conditions are conducive for you to take control, practice. This is very much a work in progress and an area I find the hardest to manage, but it's important to not give up, take the little wins of a success no matter how small and build on them.

Focus on Breathing and Relaxation Techniques:

When anxiety strikes, it's essential to manage your body's physical response. Deep breathing exercises and relaxation techniques, can help calm your mind and body. Practice these techniques before and during your sailing trips to promote a sense of inner peace and tranquillity, I find that if I notice my breathing elevating for any reason, forcing myself to regulate my breath can alleviate the onset of a more severe reaction.

Lastly, find ways to occupy your time onboard, especially on longer passages, don't give your mind the time to overthink. Audiobooks, music, podcasts, I find watching movies makes me seasick, but whatever works for you when you're on watch. Maybe take off the autopilot and hand steer for a time. It's beautiful to watch the waves, stars and ocean, but if you have the kind of mind that plays "what if", find something to occupy your time in addition to obviously being on watch.

Proactive Planning, Positive Self-Talk and Visualization:

Replace negative thoughts with positive affirmations. Remind yourself that sailing is a safe and enjoyable activity. Visualize successful and pleasurable sailing experiences, imagining the wind in your hair and the sun on your face. If you’ve spent time discussing and planning for possible issues you can reframe your mindset when an issue occurs as you are simply reacting to a situation you’d planned for which is a positive outcome to a negative situation, helping reduce anxiety and increasing your excitement for sailing.

Don’t sit in silence:

Don't hesitate to share your anxieties with others, especially those you’re sailing with. The cruising community as a whole is a wonderful, open group of people who are in the same boat (pun intended) so share and learn from each other. You’ll find they also have their own anxieties and being open and honest helps everyone in the long run. Reach out to friends or family members who enjoy sailing and ask for their support. Join sailing clubs or online communities where you can connect with like-minded individuals who can offer encouragement and advice. Sharing your fears and experiences with others who understand can be immensely comforting and empowering.

I will caveat this by repeating, find like-minded individuals, some sailors thrive on situations that for others makes their palms sweat, don’t waste time trying to get someone who doesn’t and can’t empathize with you to to be supportive. This isn’t their fault and I’m not suggesting they are bad people, friends come in all shapes, sizes and fulfil different places in our hearts and minds.

Sailing anxiety may seem insurmountable at times, but with the right strategies and mindset, it can be managed. By educating yourself, exposing yourself to sailing experiences, and employing relaxation techniques, you can build your confidence and conquer your fears. I can’t say they’ll go away completely but they can become manageable. Remember, sailing is a beautiful adventure waiting to be embraced. So, take that first step, set sail, and let the winds carry you to new horizons, knowing that you have the strength to manage any anxieties that may arise along the way.

You can follow our sailing adventures on Instagram #sailingbluemist . Please don't hesitate reach out and share any strategies you're using, we all benefit from continuing to learn new skills and techniques to find the ones that work for us individually.

Good Luck and Bon voyage! Louise